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(1 votes, average: 5 out of 5) Loading ...A family is at the dinner table. The son asks his father, “Dad, how many kinds of boobies are there?
The father, surprised, answers, “Well, son, there’s three kinds of breasts. In her twenties, a woman’s breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her thirties to forties, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit. After fifty, they are like onions.”
“Onions?”
“Yes, you see them and they make you cry.”
This infuriated his wife and daughter so the daughter said, “Mom, how many kinds of willies’ are there?”
The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, “Well dear, a man goes through three phases. In his twenties, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his thirties and forties, it is a birch, flexible but reliable. After his fifties, it is like a Christmas tree.”
“A Christmas tree?”
“Yes, dead from the root up and the balls are for decoration only.
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(1 votes, average: 5 out of 5) Loading ...Amy, a blonde Texan City girl, marries a Texas rancher.
One morning, on his way out to check on the cows, the rancher says to Amy, “The artificial insemination man is coming over to impregnate one of our cows today. I drove a nail into the two-by-four just above the cow’s stall in the barn. You show him where the cow is when he gets here, okay?”. So the rancher leaves for the fields.
After a while the artificial insemination man arrives and knocks on the front door. Amy takes him down the barn. They walk along a long row of cows and when she sees the nail, she tells him, “This is the one…..right here.”.
Terribly impressed by what he seemed to think just might be another ditzy blonde, the man asks, “Tell me little lady, how did you know this is the cow to be bred?”.
“That’s simple. By the nail over its stall,” Amy explains very confidently.
Then the man asks, “What’s the nail for?”.
She turns to walk away, and with complete confidence, says, “I guess it’s to hang your pants on…..”.
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(No Ratings Yet) Loading ...Nothing funny about this one, just a cool picture I received in a forward.
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(No Ratings Yet) Loading ...Why did the chicken cross the road?
…to kick this little kid’s butt!
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(2 votes, average: 4.5 out of 5) Loading ...These are amazing! From a competition at Harrison Lake, B.C.
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(No Ratings Yet) Loading ...A little boy walks into his parents’ room to see his Mom on top of his dad bouncing up and down. The Mom sees her son and quickly dismounts, worried about what her son has seen. She dresses quickly and goes to find him.
The son sees his Mom and asks, “What were you and Dad doing?” The mother replies, “Well, you know your dad has a big tummy and sometimes I have to get on top of it and help flatten it.”
“Your wasting your time,” said the boy. “Why is that?” the Mom asked puzzled.
“Well, when you go shopping the lady next door comes over and gets on her knees and blows it right back up.”
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(No Ratings Yet) Loading ...Let’s all be thankful that it wasn’t our kid who came home with this one:
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(No Ratings Yet) Loading ...A woman was in a coma. She had been in it for months.
Nurses were in her room giving her a blanket bath. One of them was washing her private area and noticed that there was a slight response on the monitor when she touched her. They tried it again and sure enough there was sizable movement.
They went to her husband and explained what happened, telling him, “As crazy as this sounds, maybe a little oral sex will do the trick and bring her out of the coma.”
The husband was skeptical, but they assured him that they’d close the curtains for privacy. The husband finally agreed and went into his wife’s room. After a few minutes the woman’s monitor flat lined, no pulse, no heart rate.
The nurses run back into the room. “What happened!?” they cried.
The husband said, “I’m not sure….maybe she choked?”
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(No Ratings Yet) Loading ...Would you be scared to drive across this bridge?
The Millau viaduct is part of the new E11 expressway connecting Paris and Barcelona and features the highest bridge piers ever constructed. The tallest is 240 meters (787 feet) high and the overall height will be an impressive 336 meters (1102 feet), making this the highest bridge in the world.
Slide the picture to the right/left to see the whole bridge! What a view!
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(No Ratings Yet) Loading ...Trust me, you don’t want to look at this.
You were warned.
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(1 votes, average: 4 out of 5) Loading ...Have you noticed that you computer monitor, after a few years of use is not as clear as it was when new? The reason for this is the electrostatic charges causing micro-etching on the interior surface of the glass, which in turn degrades the picture quality.
As a result you end up straining your eyes, and you can actually suffer long-term problems with your vision.
However, there is some good news. Thanks to a new computer program, this etching process is reversible. The program works on the molecules inside the screen, effectively “cleaning” the other side of your monitor glass! This process takes less than 30 seconds, and the difference will be immediately noticeable.
Scroll down to start the program, and then just let it do its work!
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OK. Your screen is clean. Now send this to someone else…
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(2 votes, average: 4.5 out of 5) Loading ...When you see this on the way out your door… You might as well turn around, go back in and have another cup of coffee. It is probably not going to be a good day!
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(No Ratings Yet) Loading ...O.K. Honey! We’re here! You can come out now…
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(No Ratings Yet) Loading ...“Hello, is this the Sheriff’s Office? Yes. What can I do for you?”
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(1 votes, average: 4 out of 5) Loading ...Greetings Freeples,
I’ve implemented a new site design based on the winning logo entry from the Worth1000 logo contest. In addition I have implemented a few new features that should make life easier and better for us all:
Rating system coming soon. I’ve heard your requests and I am working on a way to rate forwards.
If you have any comments or suggestions, please let me know!
